What does “polyamorous” mean?
June 18th, 2010Polyamorous means to desire, love, and commit to being in more than one romantic and sexually intimate relationship at a time. It requires being open, honest, and communicative with everyone in the relationships.
Infinity heart – a symbol used for polyamory.
People involved in polyamorous relationships create a world of open communication, honesty, integrity, good will, and thoughtfulness. Their world is about enjoying the erotic and passionate feelings they have for others and to be open about those feelings, and to act upon them with love and authenticity—whether those feelings are for one person or multiple. The connection does not stop with sexual love but encompasses romance, intimacy, commitment, and yes, love.
Polyamorous relationships are often misunderstood and discredited in our culture today. People involved in polyamorous relationships are not having “affairs” or being “secretive/deceptive.” Polyamory is not polygamy (polygamy has a different philosophy about partners, orientation, and gender-power). Polyamory is sometimes thought of as “swinging,” but anyone can swing whether you are in a polyamorous relationship, a monogamous relationship, or single. Sometimes people immediately think polyamory is the same thing as having sex more than one person at a time, and that’s not just not true either.
The challenges polyamorous relationships present are the fear of rejection, the feelings of jealousy, the need for control over a partner’s passions, and the fear of uncertainty. But here are some of the rewards of a polyamorous life:
- A tremendous amount of love.
- An opportunity to become an excellent communicator.
- Rich sexual experiences that can vary and expand the lives of everyone involved.
- An opportunity to learn and overcome jealousy.
- A way to grow through the fear of being “less than.”
- A life that lets go of control and accepts that the unknown is okay.
- A way to be free of being competitive.
- An ability to critically think about life in an unusual and fascinating way.
Polyamory is not always easy, but for people who are polyamorous they say it is extremely rewarding and life enhancing.
For more on polyamory, check out this interview with polyamorists in Seattle.
