Consensual Text

You already know getting tested regularly for STI’s is the “responsible” and “right” thing to do. But now, thanks to MTV, it may also be the rewarding thing to do.

MTV has partnered up with Foursquare to give one lucky winner a free trip to New York City and the opportunity to see a taping of their show “10 on Top.”  All you have to do is stop by your local testing center during the month of September and GYT (Get Yourself Tested).  While you’re there, unlock the Foursquare GYT Badge on your phone and you’ll be automatically entered into the sweepstakes.  Don’t have a smartphone? You can still enter the contest.

To get started, text your zip code to “GYTNOW” or request an appointment with us. See? Peeing into that cup may be the most beneficial thing you do all day. Good Luck!

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Semen-no two samples are exactly alike

While “Chunky,” “Lumpy,” and “Clumpy” all sound like characters from a bad porno, you have nothing to worry about. These are perfectly normal semen consistencies and are not a sign of a sexually transmitted infection.

Remember when you were a little kid and learned that no two snowflakes are identical?  Think of semen (a.k.a. cum, ejaculate) the same way–it varies from guy to guy depending on diet, biology, exercise, body temperature, and recent ejaculations. The taste can even vary depending on if he’s a smoker, or whether he’s taking medications or drugs, including alcohol.

“Normal” semen can be thick and stringy, gooey and clumpy, thin and drippy, or a combination of any of those. And in most cases, semen can be described as “milky” in color—white to yellowish-gray, and anywhere from opaque to almost transparent.

Thicker ejaculate may just mean it’s high in protein—this type of consistency causes the semen to stay high in the vagina, increasing chances of fertilization. 

If at any point your boyfriend begins to feel pain during ejaculation, or unusual discharge or odor, he should make an appointment to be on the safe side. Otherwise, have fun!

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England’s Education Department carefully selects all weekly questions. All questions are actual inquiries made to PPNNE by college-aged students.

Do you have a question you would like to see included?  Please email goddess@ppnne.org

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It can, but not in everyone.

Cyclists started talking about numbness in the genitals around 1890. Following that, ads for saddles that reduce genital numbness and tingling started appearing. People realized cycling was affecting male performance and increasing the risk of erectile dysfunction.  Luckily, saddle design has enjoyed some improvements in recent years.

Cycling can create too much pressure on the perineum, located between the external genitals and the anus. The perineum has the Alcock canal, which contains an artery and a nerve that supply the penis with blood and sensation. When a cyclist sits hard on a narrow bike seat, the blood flow decreases, diminishing the flow pressure for the penis to be able to achieve a full erection.  

 Today’s manufacturers of bike seats have developed saddles addressing some of the pressure issues, however,  people are physiologically diverse and have different bone structure and protective tissue. Cyclists have to do a little homework and find the seats best for them.  

 Three Tips:

• Wear padded bike shorts.
• Use upright handle bars so your posture changes, transferring the pressure of the perineum to the buttocks.
• If you feel numbing and tingling during a ride – stop riding for one to two weeks.  

Some alternative help tips:

• Horny Goat Weed: Increases levels of testosterone and thyroid hormones
• Yohimbe: Helps to dilate small blood vessels – especially in the penis. This herb has received FDA approval as a treatment for impotence. Discovered in South Africa, it has been used for years as an aphrodisiac.
• Ginseng: Increases stamina, helps relax blood vessels in penis, and helps produce an erection. It has been used for years as a male sexual tonic.  

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England’s Education Department carefully selects all weekly questions. All questions are actual inquiries made to PPNNE by college-aged students.

Do you have a question you would like to see included?  Please email goddess@ppnne.org

Sex drives are one of life’s greatest mysteries. Some people think about sex all day long and are ready at the drop of a hat. Others, with weaker sex drives,  are much less interested in having sex.  Then there are those who fall somewhere in between.  All are perfectly normal.

Sex drives vary from person to person due to an infinite number of reasons: circumstance, environment, personal history, hormones, values, feelings, etc. etc. The good news is there are easy (and fun!)  fixes to help your partner, or yourself, become more interested in sex.

The brain is the most important sex organ in the human body—not  the clitoris, or the penis—the brain. Our brain dictates our sex drive with neurotransmitters. Dopamine, for example, works to increase our sex drive and  Serotonin can decrease our sex drive.

Knowing your brain is a major player in sexual desire, use it to encourage positive feelings and reactions.  Use visual, auditory, or kinesthetic stimulation to influence your brain. We know this sounds cliché, but, think positively—it can have a huge effect on your sexual desire.

Another element to increase your sex drive has to do with body image—how you feel about your body and what you say about it affects both your libido and your partner’s.  When you are having sex, let go of your worries about your body – just for the moment.

Sexual satisfaction can also increase sex drive. Some tips:

• Foreplay, foreplay and more foreplay – entice him or her – get your mojo going.
• Masturbate together.
• Use lubrication to change your sex drive and sexual satisfaction.
• Reveal your fantasies to your partner.
• Try out different places to have sex – some people get charged in edgy or more public places.
• Incorporate some sex toys and different positions into your routine.
• Talk. Ask your partner what she or he would like to try – what would turn her/him.
• Leave the lights on – let your partner see you get aroused and excited.

There are also many foods that can increase your sex drive.

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There’s been a lot of repro health and birth control news lately, so we thought we’d give a quick update on what’s newly available to you. 

ellaOne: An FDA advisory panel unanimously ruled this new emergency contraception (morning after pill, Plan B) drug is both safe and effective. If you haven’t been following this story you may be wondering what the big deal is and how ella is different from current EC.

The main advantage of ella is it effectively prevents pregnancy up to five days after sex. Current EC loses effectiveness after three days. It’s not always possible for women to obtain EC within that three day window (for a number of reasons), and ella will provide women with two additional days.

It’s important to point out that ella is not an abortion pill, nor will it cause a pregnant woman to have an abortion.

HPV vaccine available for males:  As with girls/women, men can now get the HPV vaccine between the ages of 9 and 26. Makes sense to us—how else can you expect to eradicate a communicable disease if you’re only focusing on one half of the population?

Humor aside, the need for the HPV vaccine in men is great. Half of sexually active men in the U.S. will get HPV at some point in their life, but most won’t know it. HPV is easily transmitted and certain types of the virus can increase the risk of or cause cancer of the anus or penis in males, as well as genital warts.

No matter who you are or how old you are, talk with a health care provider  to find out if the HPV vaccine could benefit you or your child.

Free birth control: Last is a super-exciting story (yes, we actually are that excited!) about health insurers possibly offering contraceptives at no extra charge soon. The word on the street is that new health plans have to offer preventive services for free to patients. Many people think birth control should fall into that category, as it’s pretty much the definition of “preventive.”

One of the main reasons for unintended pregnancies has to do with the high cost of birth control. If contraception was free, the number of unintended/unwanted pregnancies could drop significantly.

It could take up to a year for the federal Health Resources and Services Administration to make it’s decision on the subect. In the meantime, we’ll be sure to keep you posted with their progress.

Happy Friday!

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England’s Education Department carefully selects all weekly questions. All questions are actual inquiries made to PPNNE by college-aged students.

Do you have a question you would like to see included?  Please email goddess@ppnne.org

Our culture loves when things are black and white—heterosexual or homosexual; straight or gay; etc. But when it comes to sexual orientation and attraction, it’s not that simple.

The type of porn you like or watch doesn’t necessarily define whether you are gay, straight, gay or bi or somewhere in between. Lots of straight people enjoy gay porn, gay people enjoy straight porn and on and on. What arouses you in porn is not a quick litmus test about your sexual orientation.

Alfred Kinsey realized we have the potential to be erotically attracted to both women and men, or mostly men or mostly women, or only men or only women. Kinsey discovered that only 10% of people are truly 100% heterosexual or 100% homosexual, and that most people fall somewhere in between.

What you should pay attention to is whether you act on the feelings you’re having.  You can’t control who you are sexually attracted to but you can control whether you act on those desires or not. And acting on your sexual desires is really dependent on your comfort level and the environment that you are living in.

If you find yourself drawn to lesbian porn and want to explore your sexuality a little deeper, try asking yourself these questions: Who do I usually have crushes on? Who do I find myself attracted to? Who do I fantasize about? Who do I see myself with in a relationship? If you have been attracted to another woman – have you acted on that or do you want to act on that? That’s something you need to figure out for yourself.

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(This week’s question came from a 19 year old male reader.)

Ever had a root canal?  (No worries…using a dental dam is not painful and doesn’t require a professional.) Your dentist probably used a dental dam to isolate your tooth that she/he was working on: it is a way to keep things free of bacteria in your mouth (dentist talk) or in your partner’s vulva or anus (sex talk).

“The little square of latex” functions as a barrier when performing oral-vaginal sex (cunnilingus) and oral-anal sex (rimming) and helps prevent the spread of STIs.

Let’s get technical first: dental dams are available for purchase over the counter in most drug stores, online, in sex shops, and at many health centers or doctor’s offices. They are made of thin latex, measuring approximately 6×8”, and come in a variety of flavors and/or scents.  There are non-latex dental dams available for people with latex allergies. As with condoms, always check the expiration date, as latex breaks down over time and loses efficacy. When this happens, small, microscopic holes allow bacteria and infection to spread, defeating the point of using one in the first place. (If the dam comes with a powder-like substance on it, wash it off and air or towel dry prior to using it.) For even more info, click here.

Now, about using it:

Spread the dam over the entire vulva, covering the vaginal opening and clitoris.  During oral-anal contact, use the dam to cover your partner’s anus.  Never use the same dental dam for both oral-vaginal and oral-anal sex.

Some people like to use some water based lubricant on the vagina or anus beforehand to increase stimulation, thus heightening the enjoyment of oral and anal sex when using a dental dam.

Alternatives to dental dams include a non-lubricated male condom with the tip cut off and cut down the length of the condom or plastic wrap (NOT the microwavable kind).

tickle and tease with the dam, especially after both of you are really ready for sex, to intensify the anticipation.

Don’t think they are too much trouble and pleasure kills – you are being safe by using one and you will both will enjoy the experience – smell, taste, stretch of the dam – if you play with it and have a little fun.

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England’s Education Department carefully selects all weekly questions. All questions are actual inquiries made to PPNNE by college-aged students.

Do you have a question you would like to see included?  Please email goddess@ppnne.org

The first thing you should do, even  before talking to your new partner about STDs, is to get yourself tested—GYT!  1 in 2 young people will get a sexually transmitted disease (STD) by age 25 – and most will go undiagnosed. Many people think they are STD-free, but aren’t, thus spreading them unknowingly.  Planned Parenthood, MTV, The Kaiser Family Foundation and the CDC have teamed up to change the silence with our  GYT campaign. Don’t just  get yourself tested, start talking about STDs and help remove the social taboos about them.

Once you’ve learned you own STD (or STD-free!)status, you are ready for the conversation with your partner.  Some tips: 

• Remind yourself that discussing STDs is a good thing—it shows your new partner that you care about your health and theirs, and that you are safe in the bedroom. It also shows you are mature enough to discuss intimate subjects.
• Time it Right—As GYTNOW points out, some times are better than others to have this talk. Before a big exam, while falling asleep in front of the TV, or when already naked, are all bad times to discuss STD testing.  Create the time and privacy needed for this conversation.
• Start the conversation by talking about yourself –
  • “I had an STD test last week because I wanted to know my status. Although I was worried about having one, I found out I don’t!”
  • “I want you to know I don’t have an STD – I was tested recently. It was easy and I didn’t have to wait too long.  I am glad I did it.”
  • “I recently heard that 1 in 2 people who are having sex get an STD by age 25…isn’t that crazy? I’m glad I got tested.”
• Listen to your partner—the odds are they are going to feel grateful and relieved that you brought it up. However, if they do not respond, go ahead and ask them what they think about getting tested. If they show hesitation or concern, explain that you are having this conversation so that you can both stay healthy and STD-free. Remind them how much you care about them and their wellbeing.
• Suggest getting tested together—Let them know that testing is affordable, painless and extremely fast. Some tests, like Rapid HIV, produce results in 20 minutes or less. Make an appointment at any Planned Parenthood health center and go together for compassionate and confidential STD testing.

We’ve recently come across some pretty interesting World Cup statistics. Now we know what you’re thinking:  “What the hell? I signed up for steamy sex news to escape my partner’s obsession with sports. Why in the world is PPNNE mentioning soccer???”  Let us reassure you— this is relevant.  So read on, o ye, of little faith, and see these staggering numbers for yourself:

4 weeks of World Cup tournament play… 32 teams competing for the World Cup… 2,200 volunteers stationed at Johannesburg’s Ellis Park stadium… 400,000 fans estimated to attend…and…

1,000,000,000 condoms needed for the World Cup. One BILLION.

South Africa announced last week it will need one billion condoms for the World Cup. Annually, more than 450 million condoms are distributed in South Africa. But with 1 in 5 adults HIV/AIDS positive, there can never be “too many.”

It’s rare that condoms and soccer are combined…but we found this cute (and impressive) DIY video and just couldn’t resist posting it.

Consensual Text is featured on Twitter and on Facebook .  Fan and follow us for info on a range of topics pertaining to sex and sexual health!

We’re assuming, dear question-submitter, that you heard somewhere or believe that there’s a scientifically proven health benefit to urinating after sex.  Perhaps your best friend told you, “Peeing after sex will kill any STDs the guy may have had.” Or maybe you believe the act of squatting over a toilet will have a gravitational pull on your man’s sperm, making it that much harder for them to impregnate you?

There’s a whole list of urban sex legends out there, which we’ll get to later. But to answer your question, should you pee after sex…? Sure. But only if you need to.

Some people really do have an urge to urinate after sex and that sensation could be happening for a couple of reasons:

• You’re drinking too much alcohol and/or too many caffeinated beverages—both are diuretics which increase your rate of urination.
• You may actually need to ejaculate, not pee.  Some women ejaculate a white clear liquid from their urethra that is sometimes mistaken for urine. Female ejaculation is usually stimulated and associated with the massaging of the G-spot. 

If you really do have to go, go ahead! Just don’t let it become a habit that will interfere with your experience after the orgasm.  The time after sex should be a relaxing and enjoyed experience with your partner. Declaring, “I really have to pee!” and jumping out of the sack is not only unromantic, it spoils your post-sex euphoria.

Now, getting back to these sex myths. Going to the bathroom right after sex does not protect you against STDs and does not keep you from getting pregnant. Here’s why: A woman’s urethra passes urine while her vagina is the pathway for sperm (STDs and pregnancy).  Although physically close, these two pathways are completely different parts of the body, with completely different functions.  Pregnancy and STDs occur through sperm or bacteria in or around the vagina. If you’re having sex with a man, the best way to protect yourself from pregnancy and STIs is to use a condom. 

The one thing that peeing after sex can do is to deter a urinary tract infection (UTI).  Urinating right after sex can help clear your urethra of unwanted organisms that are lurking around and getting ready to become full blown infections.   Some doctors advise that if you are prone to UTIs, peeing after sex can help keep an infection from beginning.   

Planned Parenthood of Northern New England’s Education Department carefully selects all weekly questions. All questions are actual inquiries made to PPNNE by college-aged students.

Do you have a question you would like to see included?  Please email goddess@ppnne.org